I ended up going to the Starbucks on Admiral to meet Angie. She and her sister and Nate were in town to go to IKEA to buy a new bed. She called earlier and knew that I was in a funk, so she called again and said that she was coming over. We visited and I'm glad, because it did bring me out of my mood. Nothing seriously sad or anything, I was just feeling wiped-out and not feeling like I could do anything. "Sadly Unfunctional" is what I call myself when I am like that. Angie is a good friend.
I told Angie about the possibility that I might be pregnant yesterday, so today she wanted us to go over to the Bartell's near the Starbucks and buy a test. It is way too soon, so it would be a waste of money. I told her that if she was still itching to do it come next Wednesday that I would, since that would be 8 days past ovulation. I think that is still too early to test, but is much more reasonable than 4 dpo. What I am waiting on now are any signs of implantation--pain, spotting. I for sure had that with William. I can't remember how many dpo it happened, and I didn't keep any record of it. But if I remember correctly it can happen as soon as 5 dpo, up to a week later...
I need to distract myself somehow. It will be nice to have Mom and Dad come for a visit tomorrow. We don't see each other nearly enough. I should wrap all of the presents I have for everyone so that they can take them home with them tomorrow. And I really should tidy up around here before they visit. It really isn't so bad, just messy.
A part of me really feels like writing, and another part of me just feels like vegging and watching tv or something. Ugh. I hate when I want to get something out, but can't. I guess it is because I am getting consumed by this idea that I might be pregnant and I don't want to feel in any way bad about that. Damn it. This is so stupid, because here I was (still am, really) afraid that I will have a hard time getting pregnant and worried about that. I wish that there was a test that could just tell me, because I am feeling a lot of the things I felt when I was pregnant before. My abdomen feels...full. Not achey or crampy, but full...throbbing a bit is the best way to describe it. And I have had to pee a lot, even though I haven't been drinking as much water as I usually do. And my bbs are starting to feel tender, especially the nips. So there are the symptoms. Nothing miraculous, just that...and this "feeling" I can't quite describe.
Enough. I need to get it out, I guess, but I'm not sure how much it helps. I'm going to go and busy myself with some houskeeping...maybe get out the altered book I am working on. My students have their critique for the altered book project on Tuesday and I am so looking forward to seeing all of them. I've seen them as they have been working, of course, but it will be cool to see them all together. I will definately take pictures of them.
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