The sense of reassurance I felt after this week's visit to the Peri didn't last long. Now I have myself convinced that something horrible is just around the corner. Because...of course everything has been fine so far, it was fine at 20 weeks last time, too.
How will I get through the next few weeks? Will I "get through" the next few weeks?
I feel like I shouldn't be going around acting like things are OK. Today I went shopping with Mothership and after about an hour or so of walking around I started to have this nagging thought that I shouldn't be on my feet. I haven't altered my activity-level over the last several weeks, yet my cervical length has remained good and long. But does that mean that I should continue with this level of activity until something changes for the worse? Or should I start taking it easier, as a preventative measure?
I sound pathetic.
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6 comments:
If taking it easy helps your emotional health in the teeniest, tiniest way, it can't hurt I say. But if it just means you will sit around and worry, then not such a good idea.
I know how you feel, thinking everything was fine at this stage last time too. I don't know if you will feel 'better' after you pass your loss week. I didn't have that as I lost Laurent at 40 weeks. Just keep trying to remind yourself, this is a different pregnancy and so much is being done differently.
Hope you manage to find some moments of peace and calm. Thinking of you and the little bean!
HUGS
Hi Michelle,
((HUGS)) I don't think you sound pathetic - just nervous. I'm having the same thoughts. I wish I could write something that would make you feel better, but I know the worry monster has a way of sometimes overiding even the most determined positive thinker.
Take it easy if it'll put your mind at ease. I've been trying my own modified rest schedule; basically I try not to be standing or active for long without a lie-down break. Don't know if it'll make a difference, but it can't hurt.
The lead-up to loss week can be really hard. Last time around, I found the only way to get through each day was one at a time - to try to stay in the moment as much as possible. LOL, easier said than done, I know. Ice cream and other treats help too!
Janice
You don't know me but I stumbled on your blog through a link on someone elses's blog. I am a few weeks ahead of you and can certainly understand how you feel... if taking it easy will helpyour mental state do that.. I find that a combination of things make me feel better for a while and then guilt sets in. I will be with you through the journey... you are an inspiration.
Not pathetic. Natural. Coming up on the week was so nervewracking. I say do what you need to do to get through. If that means laying on your back watching mindless TV for a while, sounds good to me.
Walking with you through this complicated time...
I think it's pretty normal to be feeling like this. I have really made myself step back from everything this time round, even though I know it would be OK for me to be more active I've chosen not to. Why bother doing anything that makes you even slightly concerned?
I am currently holed up in my empty bedroom with the cats while S deals with the house being packed and moved. I cleaned the bathrooms this morning and now I'm done. It's tough to step back but I don't want to worry that I've overdone it.
I hope the next few weeks stay uneventful for you and you can get your mojo back a little. I know for sure mine comes and goes.
you sound like a good mother who has had a bad experience and wants to make sure it doesn't happen again. that is not pathetic, far from it. hang in there.
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